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Dave Thaler's avatar

“The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one.”

That old line from Star Trek has been rattling around in my head while reading this, particularly that troublesome little word again: need.

We tend to treat need as evidence of deficiency.

If I need something, I must lack something, therefore, if I lack something I must somehow be incomplete.

But I'm beginning to wonder whether that only describes one kind of need.

Perhaps sometimes need arises not because we are separate, but because we are connected.

A tree needs water.

A child needs another human being.

A community needs its members just as its members need the community.

Those relationships do not necessarily reveal deficiency but perhaps they reveal relationship itself, which is making me increasingly reluctant to decide too quickly what that relationship ultimately means.

In fact, perhaps “relationship” is to you what “need” has become to me, a word that keeps opening doors.

I feel the danger for both of us may be deciding too quickly what it points to.

The younger trees I experienced during my NDE needed what the older tree's deeper roots could provide during drought.

Their need wasn't a failure of the forest, but pointing to the deeper relationship within it.

And that brings me to another part of my experience that I have never quite known how to describe.

When I seemed to pop out of my humanness, there was that overwhelming sense of all-encompassing love, but there was something else as well: a kind of knowing

A thought would arise and, almost simultaneously, the answer was simply there.

I cannot tell you what produced that experience, and I remain reluctant to give it an explanation it did not give me but the knowing did not feel as though it came from a single other presence.

It felt like many acting as one.

That distinction has become increasingly interesting to me, many acting as one is not necessarily the same thing as the many becoming One.

An orchestra can play as one without becoming one musician. A forest can function as one living community without becoming one tree.

What if what disappears in profound connection is not need, but grasping—the need to possess, control, or complete ourselves through another.

Perhaps relationship does not have to end in dissolution at all.

Perhaps distinction can remain while separation disappears.

There is one more part of my experience that makes me wonder about this.

I remember how extraordinarily free I felt outside my body. “Free” hardly describes it. The absence of its weight and boundaries felt indescribably positive.

Looking back, I wonder whether the body creates, or at least contributes to, our sense of isolation. Skin provides an extraordinarily convincing boundary: this is me, and everything beyond it is not me.

Yet when that boundary seemed absent in my experience, I did not experience myself as disappearing.

Quite the opposite.

I still experienced.

I still wondered.

I still seemed, somehow, to be me.

What seemed to disappear was the isolation.

And perhaps that is the distinction I have been struggling toward.

What if connection does not require the many to become One.

Maybe the many can remain many while no longer experiencing themselves as separate.

if so, perhaps need doesn't disappear with separation either. Perhaps some needs only become fully understandable once we recognize the relationship.

Maybe the opposite of need isn't wholeness.

Maybe the opposite of need is isolation.

And even that is only a conclusion I'm trying very hard not to fall in love with.

Thomas Gerry's avatar

Your analysis here resonates deeply, Glen. After studying the work of the poet, playwright and visual artist James Reaney, and working with him as a student, I still didn't understand what he was actually up to. Years later I had the chance to write about his emblems, little puzzles that invite their readers to explore Reaney's way of seeing the world. This exploring led me through many conversations, galleries and libraries, and the book pretty much wrote itself. Reaney called his artistic approach the "magnetic method," drawing out connections among things that at first could seem unrelated. Metaphor--another "meta" word--is the linguistic turn that epitomizes this connecting process. Interestingly, metaphor is far from esoteric, even though some of the terminology used to express these concepts might make it seem so: our language, everyday and otherwise, is thoroughly metaphorical.

Reaney's art often involves circles and other geometric elements. From a different angle than the one I discovered, your analysis explains why, and also why it is that we're all drawn to these shapes. Thank you.

Tom

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